Cardinals Hold Tryouts to Find Relievers They Can Trust

June 24, 2011

Plagued by much-publicized bullpen troubles, the St. Louis Cardinals released veteran right-hander Miguel Batista this week.

Anytime Tony La Russa is forced to let go of a 40 year-old reliever allowing nearly two base runners an inning, you know it’s a cry for help from the Cardinals manager.

But it turns out the situation may be more desperate than anyone could have imagined. After blowing far too many late-inning leads this season, the Cardinals have resorted to holding private tryout sessions in order to find some relievers they can trust.

You’d be hard pressed to find any info on these private workout sessions, because in typical close-to-the-vest Cardinals fashion the press and public have been barred from attending. But once again thanks to our far-reaching JSF sources we’ve been able to obtain the following footage:

Apparently the Cardinals are so desperate for relief help they’re contemplating turning to a cheesy, local mortgage lender with a rocket arm but a little rough around the edges, despite being a sharp dresser.

At least La Russa seemed impressed, so that’s a good sign.